The Book of Ballads and Sagas #1

Book of Ballads and Sagas (The) (1995) -1- Thomas the Rhymer

The False Knight on the Road written by Gaiman (and my sole reason for getting the issue), shows a boy readying to go to school, and his ma warning him to stay away from the well, since his pa’d drowned. The boy acknowledges her, and goes off walking through the wilderness, seeing the False Knight near the well and asking him where he was headed and what his backpack contained. The boy answers honestly and the FK continues his interview, soon learning the boy carried a fire starter for school. as well, and the sheep nearby belonged to the boy and his ma, it getting squirrely when the FK asks which of the sheep were his, the boy cleverly stating it’d be the one’s with unnatural colored tails, the FK leading the subjects to areas where what the boy needed would get broken and the boy responding smartly of the FK getting the repercussions, the last statement the boy makes in reply regarding the well, making the FK disappear, and he making his way to the schoolhouse.

Eerie little poem comic. I decided to forgo the 2 other stories, since they only partially required more issues to continue the story, and I in it solely for the Gaiman.


Neil Gaiman’s Lady Justice

Free Comic Book Day - LADY JUSTICE

A shipment of something is being remedied with guns, meanwhile someone else is close to death, he apparently a bro to 1 of the rescuers, a sis being referenced, whom’d hopefully keep her shit together. The ambulance driver makes sure the hospital gets the rare blood type needed ready for this guy’s survival, AB negative. As they reach hospital, men with weapons and face masks are after the blood store, 1 guy shooting a nurse to show he’s serious, and as the cops learn of the murder heist, they see the men packing the blood into a van. Then a doc visits a lady at home whom is bedridden and sleeping, her parents and herself in a horrible accident which had her lose the use of her legs, along with her parents lives. As they talk outside the room, the girl’s cat is keeping closer company these days. Then, an unknown voice speaks of whether she wanted to avenge her fam. like the Crow, she waking and scaring kitty. Janie is then seen in her wheelchair at her bros viewing, she not going to their coffins, til the 4rd day. This is where she discovers a length of cloth held in her 2nd bros hand, she then shown in her room with the cloth and the voice asking if she’s accepted her role, putting it over her eyes blind-fold-style, then being able to walk, and upon listening to the voice tell her to approach her mirror, Lady Justice informs they were 1. Now they could get justice for her bro, Lady Justice able to help remind Janie who was responsible and tracking 1 down and beating him up to show she meant bidness, getting the info she needed, getting to her bro’s gunman and he being an arrogant prick, not ready to own up to his punishment, and attempting to bind her to fulfill his bondage fantasy, she throwing his ass across the room with her legs. She then schools him good by kicking and punching a hole in his tum, this being enough for the fool to call Uncle and wanting to go to jail, but his justice not including ‘Merica’s system. She punches a few holes into him, perhaps tap-dancing, what with her ballet background, justice now served.

And the story continues, but for me, shall most likely end here. Good and violent, but this was a freebie comic and my interest was more with Gaiman, even though he didn’t write this and it was only based off a concept. Regardless of she being a bad ass super heroine, she’s well worth the intro issue in the way of violence being met and handed properly, I on the other hand, prefer to mosey along that dusty trail.

One Life – Furnished in Early Moorcock


An albino prince announces his sword is called Stormbringer, and slurps souls up, a boy writing. A princess then offers her life, so the boy could gain strength, but he claims to not want it like this. So, the princess shows her tits and points where her heart would be, so he could give it to her, this being as far as the growing boy’d gotten. He hadn’t bothered continuing, since after he’d been put ahead a grade, it wasn’t worth writing 1 story past 12 months. He’s now 12 and tantalized still by the topic of his story, and its title. At 9, he’d read the source of his story, Stormbringer, he discovering 2 more related novels, then discovering the semi-related books, but they not quite as good as the original Elric’s. Richard, the boy mused on finishing his story and publishing it in a magazine, but not wanting to upset the author Moorcock. As Richard muses on his sketch in class, a boy comes in to inform him of his schedule changing, having him playing football, now. Richard tied with another boy on being the most unorganized, feeling like he lived on a different plain as everyone. He hates school sport participation, never making an effort to win or score. Showers and baths were also an annoyance, the coach yelling with coordination of boys going into showers then baths. When coach wasn’t eyeballing them, an older boy played with his cock openly, Richard ignoring this. besides this, he’d learned his family’s butler’s sigy for useful mo’s, he hating the man, and after showering, gets back to his novel reading.

Richard is then bothered by an adult-sized boy hassling him about his school tie, and nearly choking him. As he’s losing oxygen, he sees a strange man down the walkway, the stone coming up to meet him. Richard then discovers himself next to a Sandman-looking fella, he seeing him as Elric, asking if he’d been serious about wanting to accompany heroes, but Richard not making the cut, seeing Elric’s eyes looking like a previous bunny pet’s, he asking Elric as he left what he could do, then entering a temple and sampling lives, getting further away from his own. He travels for thousands of years and lives gratifying lives. Then, he feels like he’s been tugged from life, and as he resurfaces, becomes annoyed with having thought this’d been long, since done with, the boy whom’d tightened his tie, looking scared for almost killing him, and apologizing repeatedly, then taking him to the nurse with a false story making him look the hero.

After seeing the nurse, whom gave him an aspirin, then to the principal, where he was made to let it go, Richard ends up apologizing for wasting the man’s time, apparently. Richard then describes the school priest doubling as the biology teacher, the mad having taken his class of 15 yr olds and 12 yr old Richard to his home where he cut apart a bunny and pumped its bladder til it exploded. He also took bar mitzvah lessons with his cousins whom’d boast of eating burgers to each other, Richard not bothering with the chicken stew at school anymore what with finding a rabbit’s foot in his bowl, sticking with bread n buttah. 1 time, he calls the operator to see if Moorcock’s # was available, it wasn’t. He keeps track of all the books he’d read of his, the few he couldn’t locate, ordered from the back of the book, courtesy of papa, also discovering Moorcock’s death.

Details of Elric’s companion is given, he being the light-hearted soul to Elric’s wearied 1, this also being when Richard’s sexuality was awakening and he’d dreamed he’d gotten with a girl and orgasms came from the heart (how sweet). When he read 1 of his barbaric novels in school church, he felt oddly righteous, his weekdays catering to the Christian God and his nights filled with his myth-based variety of everything else. Narnia’d gotten kicked out recently, when he’d uncovered its allegory and didn’t like feeling the author was being slick. Moorcock felt real, he not trying to pull a fast 1, in Richard’s view, he addicted, but never having paid the extra quarter for his book, not purchasing anymore books through post. For some reason, Richard’d also been brought into plenty of kids’ confidences, knowing forgotten secrets, like the spot boys and girls flashed their nethers at each other.

Mac, his buddy mentions how good and evil angels living on your shoulders truly worked, he then asking if Richard had ever handled an adults cock, he fresh off of hearing this nonsense from the biology preacher, Richard vehemently spouting to the negative, esp. since he hadn’t gotten to doing it to himself, yet. Sometimes boys at school did it communally, Mac then offerring a chance to join the exclusive religious chat group they had going for bio teacher’s o’s. Richard declines for joo-ness, this not mattering ofc, but he then mentioning his newfound Moorcock and offering it once he finished. Richard was soon imagining confining Moorchock to tell him his writing secrets, thinking it had to do with the forgotten temple and annoyance at returning, he believing there had to be an actual place where the ideas sprung. Half a year later, his bud Mac is reading with him whilst they wait for him to get picked up, he asking Mac if he knew his career path, Mac going with being a writer like Moorcock or T.H. White, and whilst Richard’d have said the same if Mac hadn’t beaten him to it, he went with a wolf, during the important times at night. The 2 continue to wait as life begins to truly start with adulthood.

A preview of Stormbringer with Elric and his love Zarozinia, and as crazy war is threatening, he discovers the horn from an older era, and would hopefully have him gain possession of Stormbringer.

Another win from Gaiman, I do wish I had more to read of this story, but it was entertaining with its briefness, regardless.

The Suicide Forest

Aokigahara Forest (Location) - Comic Vine

The artist, GHW’d signed and sketched an adorbs skull amongst a dark tree background in ’16 for someone on the copy I acquired.

The tale begins with a forestry worker seeing the signs to dissuade people from killing themselves in the forest, to think of their parents and seek help. He and female worker discuss how many bodies were discovered in the year, nearly a hundred, and how it’d first been used because the elderly and young couldn’t survive the diseases going around and get left like no-longer-cute puppies. The girl jokes about how Taro doesn’t need to be afraid of the girl from the Ring getting him, focusing on the signs they needed to display around the forest.

Meanwhile, a girl opens her heart to lurv for the guy she was eating with in a cafe, discussing the history of the city they were in never closing shop, the guy, Alan takes it well and the 2 are content with their date. Unfortunately, Masami’s pleading to not get dumped by him after a year together, she adamant she could make him happy this time. Alan makes clear how often they’d attempted to get this to work, and failed, so when she scratches her face from despair, he’s more resolved to get her to figure her own shit out (agreed), her last threat as he walks down the street, to wack him with a bottle, and he biffing off with a head wound.

In the forest, their service pup leads them to another body. The female worker shows her dark humor by commending this fool for at least going off the main trail, but this only due to how often people ruined the forest in general by dying there, anyways. They return to the station with it and would be ready to hand it off for the morgue pick up next morning. Even though Taro was supposed to do it, the girl spends the night next to the corpse per superstitious tradition, it looking zombified next to its dead body.

Fun, will read more if it’s readily cheaply available!

Saint for Rent – To Lay Down One’s Life for Cat’s Nine

Look how pretty this is? Just look at it! The story is a fair draw-in, as well, since it’s like taking the clunkiness of Potter-style travel, and spins it with Time! Plus, who can deny flash animation, I ask you? NOT I…at least not this time, this webcomic’s fun from the start.

First Saint is introed as being the proprietor of a Time Travel Inn, which people and others visit by going through the closet. Saint isn’t one by nature, but feels he wouldn’t turn down a saintship due to the sorts of requests he was asked to fulfilled by some of his customers to stop in. When 1 of them asks him to use a wand to kill a monster, it and she disappear upon he acquiescing, but is then greeted by a popping-into-his-timezone cat. Once he gets insight from different time inn-owners as to what the cat was (a real cat) and why it’d come, Saint believing it could’ve been the Asian girl whom’d asked for his help, 1 of the future inn-owners confirming its catdom. When the cat jumps off and starts becoming like a billy goat, making it difficult to reclaim her again, presuming the kitty is a girly, 1 of the other people watching him lose the cat as she sits off in a far up spot, decides he had better things to do then chase her down. Armand commenting on plumbing work needing to get done, Saint glad he was offering to help *Wink wink* . They then attempt speaking Spanish at it, since it was rumored cats were suckers for one of the Lurv languages.

Meanwhile, as he’s checking the first room for the disappeared monster, kitty comes back and brings with her another traveler wanting Saint to kill a monster, he now equipped with sword. Saint goes out and sees Armand wrassling with a monster, perhaps not the monster, he claiming he’d been trying to help Saint get his little miss kitty back. Armand scares Saint as he’s pushed by this monster over the edge of the 2nd floor, but he stating he still was handling the situation, even though he’s being watched by guests down below who look terrified at his descent, 2 men finding a sack to break his fall with. 1 of the guys mentions how this was how you used time travel to save your own ass; not actually understanding how this occurred. They then advise Saint to kill it by stabbing the head, he uncertain with its odd acting movements, which involves he getting wrapped by its flexible limb, the others debating how best to help him. Kitty distracts it for a mo., then confusingly, the cat turns into a girl, whom is caught by one of the guys on the first floor, Saint coming soon after. He then considering the best option for the monster is to probably bury it with flowers, he having lived through this 3 times before another fella thinking of stuffing it in the closet. Then it’s clearer of Armand’s future self having helped to catch those who’d fallen and 1 of em was returning to their time.

Saint was more concerned with his inn no longer being more damaged than it already was, but then soon deflated with not only future Armand leaving, but many of the other guests, this-time Armand deciding it was shower power and expected Saint to handle lunch by the time he was out, Saint a bit let down by all his guests leaving so abruptly, but Armand making the good point of they probably not interested in residing with a monster, Saint hoping this didn’t garner bad reviews. Then kitty fetches Saint’s pops manacle, which hadn’t been a part of his inheritance, wondering where puddy had found it. The saved girl then declares the monster had been carrying it, insulting Saint’s intelligence, which he suavely knocks back with his skills in the kitchen, brunch being a good showoff mo.

This is the 1st 40 pages which is listed on Goodreads, but I’ll be including the Travel Log, since the next book starts after this chapter, or tagalong ch., anyways.The Travel Log takes place in the future.

Armand is the only one and, and is interrupted by a time cop/Reaper when he declares the host is out, but Reaper is apparently troubled by present-Armand, whom tries to get out of taking responsibility for Reaper stating his time-traveling license had expired, he then confiding how Armand would have a stroke in under a minute. Armand realizes future fella is the Reaper, he preferring the title of time police, Armand also asking respectfully to not get taken out just yet. Then Armand reveals he has important info which’d help him claim an important immortal, upon investigating this claim, Reaper wanting more deets. When Armand falls and hits his head, learning Reaper had stopped time within half a second of his fatality, he decides to go along with him and help, Reaper stating how if he introed himself properly, Armand wouldn’t be able to say his name, anyways, so gives the name Casimir Demort, the last fellow time-traveler’s name for him. Armand then suggests they go to The Helen Inn, Armand’s first hotel, which’d allow them to get to where they could find this immortal, Armand reminded how he’d been 17 when he’d started at Helen’s.

This is the last part before the 2nd book! Dang, I like it, the art and coloring, much more flash ani. than I thought there’d be, which makes it a little confusing for me, but I guess it’s a part of the draw, since the story apparently gets easier to follow with the 2nd reading. I’m digging it, though and I’ll definitely follow from here on!




Cucumber Quest (Vol. 5 Webcomic, Ch. 4)

The Quartet make it back to the Crystal Kingdom and get some warm clothes before checking in with the other Princess to make certain she hadn’t been accosted by a Disaster master. This princess was aware and had been planning on confront Quakemaster, Almond squeeing over witnessing princess fight possibility. Carrot is wondering at this princess’s ability to overtake this other disaster master, what with being more powerful than the previous, she sticking to her guns and Peridot attempting to act all suave and mysterious has it ruined again by Almond. Peridot reveals how they’re going for the master which edges out even Double Night, so when she biffs off, the group decides to split up their efforts, Almond sticking with her bro, which will also piss off Peridot, since it’d mean she wouldn’t be facing her.

Whilst Cuco and Almond are walking along, they get into a fight about how things went down with the Double Night, Cuco admitting Almond’s blame in this whole adventure, she walking off and Nautilus attempting to lighten her up with a little reminder how she could’ve done better to warn them during more opportune moments, as well and she needed Almond’s skills in order to protect her, so she should get her head straight. They then walk directly to Cordelia and Peridot looking suave, but not for long when Cordelia reads the message Double Night left in her book she’d been planning to call the Forsaken Master. Cordelia realizes her mistake, but next Cuco and Almond are trapped together, she admitting how she still believed the Double Night was attempting to trick him, but not liking how it came out, her words getting jumbled, Cuco understanding, and then the 2 walking through to a lighted area.

They are addressed by a disembodied voice, it going for a specific fear, neither one seemed aware it was going for this, it trying other ways as the 2 remain confused. They begin to crack up and then hear Nautilus, following her laugh, she inviting them to watch an emotionally dippy movie. They must endure a dull new fear on each elevator floor, the creature either getting the meaning wrong, or it not being scary. Cordelia meanwhile doesn’t understand this master’s failure, looking to the end of the book and it basically relating how he was kidding. Peridot hysterically laughing. The Forsaken Master comes out from his shadows when Cuco finds his seam, looking like a cutesy Halloween fella, he running off for sadness none of his levels scared them. Cuco and Almond catch up though and they learn his, odd ass name, his nickname, Besty and this not even being the best part. Nautilus stays positive for him, Besty confessing how he’d truly wanted to do his best for Steve, pff HAHA! Great stuff, this. Then, Besty does the unexpected and asks to be sealed back up again, he wanting to work on his art. Now they must figure out how to turn him back into a seal stone, since he was a bit different the the rest, Peridot revving up to do her usual spell when Almond asked if she had anything to contribute.

It doesn’t take, Cuco asked to try with his fancy wand, everyone impressed with its glow, which brings out what looks like Punisher Pumice’s costume draping upon Cuco, Almond and Peridot realizing they fangirl’d the same show. Besty decides to give them a show since they were going to put him back, so Cuco magics a huge drain, which serves Besty’s purpose, he happily awaying. Peridot reluctantly offers to tell Almond what happens in the new episode when it airs, since she’s bizzy, with evil villain stuuuff. Then, Cuco doubts Besty’s true masterness, remembering Carrot attempting to conquer Quakemaster, Cordelia making this her outro for “tricking” them with the distraction, Peridot wanting to make a playdate with Almond sometime. Cuco, knowing they needed to go retrieve his real wand from those wand cleaner stealers, reminds Nautilus and they all wonder what their motive could’ve been to give him the Pumice wand. Cuco and Almond get on better ground with each other, and Almond reiterates truly being regretful for how it played out, but she’d look out for him, what with actually wanting to be heroic.

Then, an afterward with Besty hoping he didn’t upset Steve, Besty realizing the pit he’d gone through in the drain, went to a button looking headstone. Upon pressing it, the large creature thanks him for being awakened, Steve popping out. He greets Besty warmly, the two catching up on how Besty got there, he confused about the big drain plug, but upon seeing it, they go through, Besty not where he’d started, but def. still on Dreamside. Steve then throws Besty for a loop when he mentions doing eeevil! Then it skips to Cordelia testing 1 of Double Night’s lemon cupcakes, devine-ness being bandied. Double Night then calls Cordelia out on Peridot’s role in all of this, Cordelia admitting she liked the little spunky gal, they having met not long before this whole spell-casting disaster stones began.

Then Cordelia suggests Double Night give the cupcakes to Peridot, she inviting him to watch Punisher Pumice again. The twisty turn being the Pancetta baring her heart to her crush and he collecting stones (1 being her heart) in order to summon Double Night!! Punisher Pumice then turns up to defeat him, but when he aims a shot at her, Pan protects her, this making Peridot glare heartbrokenly with anger at Double Night. AAAWW, so cute! Plus, a twist which has Peridot scream-hooting for awesomeness. This has Double Night questioning what he should be allowing these writers to get away with using his image, he allowing Peridot to accompany even though he was considering different ways to shut them down.

Later, Double Night visits Parfait, he taking care of Tomato’s weirdness. and informing her of leaving for a bit to speak to Quakemaster and another thing… Then from the studios perspective as they’re revelling in how fortunate they added the Nightmare Knight to their story, the lights go out. After which a mini drama from the actor Nightmare Knight and Peridot fangirling to get Bacon’s autograph. Cuco also finally able¬† to trade his magic wand for the real one, it being a genuine accident. Cuco then offers Nautilus his protection, as well, regardless of she technically their to aid them, Nautilus touched and grateful by his sentiment. After, they begin to think of Carrot and how he’s probably fine since his upgrade, but they’ll be on their way to him next.

And onward the comic goes, and I with it, at least so far to 922. Huzzah! An engaging, wonderful comic!

Cucumber Quest (Vol. 4 Webcomic, Ch. 3)

Nautilus recognizes their pizza homies as the Limbo crew, they now quite a somber group for not being able to continue their limbo ways, Nautilus trying to keep their spirits up. To make matters worse, the next kingdom lacked a princess, so how they were to collect the siggy’s from each kingdom without a princess available makes a quick, pausing hiccup. Meanwhile Rosemaster wants to look her best whilst she speaks with Double Night about her grand plan, which didn’t impress him much. Rosemaster started to yearn for the old days when it was easier to be evil, their first run through their evil plans. She does reveal which in the quartet could actually do them trouble, she digressing about Double Night’s choice of words when harping on all the failures they’d had. She doesn’t mention which of the group would be dangerous, but does vow a good show whilst they played with the children.

Botanica Springs didn’t have royalty the way the rest of the Kingdoms had, they were verging on gangsters. The “King” there was of fashion at their capital, the quartet crashing their style event in order to figure out which “royalty” choice they had to sign the sword. As they each have their own emotion about the loud in style, Cuco deduces how the chat with the Double Knight basically q’d how any of the heroes all these 99 times, had gotten the siggy before them, if they didn’t have a princess, since the beginning. The King of Style picks girls from the crowd as honorary princess of style, Almond among them. Nautilus is currently in a cave-like area with Liquus she meeting Rosemaster and reassuring her how the rest of her group was content, this after insulting her charmingly.

Back at the style show, Cuco is angrily wondering why and how his dad was somehow hosting the contest, he explaining he was only making an income, is all. The 4 girls then start the task, receiving a flower and having to look for the trophy whilst keeping the flower til the end. Rosemaster is learning of Nautilus’ escape and demanding her minions to find them. The style of underwear dude sets her down after they knew they lost the minions, the fella running off and coming back with a stylish outfit, Nautilus learning they were in a dark, giant closet. Peridot then says how she was after Almond, her pop making fun of her for kinda stalking her. After denying it profusely, she lets out with how dumb Almond was for believing the contest was real, reality changing, and Almond looking at Carrot, whom had forgotten why he’d climbed atop an odd looking precipice point.

From his vantage though, he sees Cuco, whom then confronts Double Night, wanting to compromise, somehow. Double Night attempts to relate how complicated the situation truly was, when he’s distracted by Cuco’s wand, but then has a flashback and hardens up, showing he didn’t care by swiping at them and making them fall down a crevasse. Carrot pleads with Double Night to spare them all, and when he awakes, Double Night mocks his emotions, but this also being what saved them. Meanwhile Rosemaster/Thornmaster, is holding Peridot hostage now, she having messed up, and if she complained more, she’d be worse off than jail. Rosemaster shows how upset she is when she’s alone, then being confronted by Glitchmaster, it commending her good work all these 99 times. Glitchmaster wants to confide who is responsible for keeping them back, they having to take him out if they wished to succeed this time.

Glitchmaster then asks she do the job, since it was suspicious of him to even be present, she agreeing what with their recent long time betrayer. Almond is currently at the end of the search, they locating the trophy and a chest, which contained the letter from Princess Parfait. They are then confronted by the Gaurdener, his name depth ofc, confusing the hell out of them, he letting them know they were in the Queen Lotus’ garden. He claims to have frightened the Rosemaster with his power and face, he making the suggestion if they could look upon him they could take the Hocus crocus which was the trophy and also a magic enhancer. Meanwhile, Peridot is complaining hella loudly about her odd cell, so much to the point of wishing for a normal door, at and getting it, magic-style, this magical door still closed, and seeming confused when she asking it to open.

Nautilus helps her, she ofc, salty about it, and Almond with Cuco get back to the Style King and she somehow has the trophy with her. Upon handing it off to a rep for safe-keeping whilst they readied her for the 2nd test, Cuco decides to follow the rep, due to suspiciousness, but gets himself caught after Carrot helps him deduce where they were, after seeing a bunch of odd flowers floating around. Almond comes back thinking she’d be needed, Cuco already having helped himself after Rosemaster minions were body-checking him, but she disappointed with his conquering skills.

They then all trying to catch up to Rosemaster before she got the trophy magic flower, but this doesn’t happen, Glitchmaster attempting to get it off her, but she going rogue and keeping it, glitching his ass out of existence. She then confronts the group, showing off her upgrade, and putting them all down after showing Almond what for when she cuts her off to get to the point, taking her elsewhere to chat. When they arrive, Almond sees Carrot, and Rosemaster does something to Almond which makes her swing at Carrot off a ledge, he falling and talking about his failure to another presence and when he awakes, sees lil creatures eating grass and talking of having Carrot’s letter, the Gaurdener never wanting it but only attempting to divert them from the Crocus, pff, haha.

Carrot reads and is so overcome, his pendant starts glowing along with Parfait’s, he returning to face Rosemaster. She somehow has a convulsive flash to where Glitchmaster airs his grievances with Rosemaster for edging him out, discussing the true nature of Double Night, and how Rosemaster was going to indulge herself before she won. Double Night turns up and shuts shit down, disappearing Peridot, Rosemaster defeated, Cuco deciding they’d give Rosemaster’s stone to the minions, since they hadn’t been tricked into serving her, they liked her.

Then, Double Night is shown with Peridot and she invites him to watch her teen show, Punisher Pumice, a close up look of the episode they watch to follow. Double Night then speaks with Parfait, she thanking him for giving Carrot her letter, then Double Night recalls how they fell into playing the same fight out so many times. A bit more is shown, some side stories are given, and a flashback of Cabbage almost being made to quest like Cuco sheds some interesting light on at least one of an almost-hero’s strange experience with the Oracle.

This is a quite addictive series, and it certainly isn’t taking long to catch up! I’ll be following D.G. Gigi’s work, for sure!